Tuesday, September 12, 2006

The Art of Oral Sex - Jamie Chang

People have been using their mouths to stimulate each other sexually for about as long as there have been people. How about kissing each other? Men have been kissing women on their necks, ears, breasts, backs, thighs, and any where else they can think of that'll arouse them sexually ever since they found out it works. It didn't take long for some enterprising man to find out that kissing a woman's vulva worked, did it ever. The Latin word cunnilingus was coined to describe licking the vulva.

Men were not alone in searching for ways to arouse the opposite sex. Some equally enterprising woman found out that men liked for her to suck their penis, it worked just as well. The Latin word fellatio was coined to describe sucking the penis.

Let's define and use the more common words to describe men and women's genitalia and the various sexual acts. Pinus, cock; vulva, pussy; vagina, cunt; Coitus, fuck; cunnilingus, eating pussy; fellatio, sucking cock, blowjob; performing cunnilingus or fellatio, giving head; ejaculate, cum or shoot his load; orgasm, cum or climax; pubic hair, women muff or bush, men bush.

Many men and women, today probably most, use some form of oral massage or kissing of the sex organs as a normal part of foreplay to warm up their partners prior to fucking. They probably don't think of that as "giving head," and I would agree that it's not. It's simply a part of the foreplay used to prepare each other for fucking and hopefully achieving a sexual climax.

Giving head, on the other hand, is used by one to bring the other to climax by use of, primarily, the mouth and tongue. For those couples who develop the required skills and self restraint, both can cum together using the 69 position.

You have to develop an understanding of the intimate feelings and emotions that occur while you're performing oral sex and during a climax, and how to respond to those feelings. Giving head is much more intimate than fucking and, if approached with the right attitude, can be more emotionally satisfying. Both the man and woman need to become familiar with what the other's emotional needs are, not just what it takes to make each other cum.

Only in the movies does a man grab a woman and say, take your clothes off, I want to fuck, or vise-versa. You have to pick a time and place other than the kitchen where the baby has just thrown a bowl of food all over your wife, although it might be a welcome distraction right abought then. Giving head requires at least as much emotional preparation as fucking. For the subject to even come up, one partner has to have built up the desire. That partner then has to build up the desire in the other partner.

Getting the other to let you bring them to orgasm is generally the easiest. If you just want to eat her pussy or she just wants to suck your cock, then all that's required is a willingness to submit, and this is important, with the expectation of achieving orgasm. Getting the other to bring you to orgasm requires the art of gentle persuasion. If you just want her to suck your cock or she just wants' you to eat her pussy, a slightly different situation exists. A woman can probably convince a man to eat her pussy without much effort. All that's generally required is for him to be in a reasonably good mood. If he just wants her to suck his cock, and she wasn't already thinking about sex, then he's going to have to get her in the proper mood first.

You'll find out that no matter who starts, the other will probably end up getting head also, either that or you'll end up fucking. Given this inevitable result, it's nice if both of you can build each other up first. Once you're both ready, he should give her head first, or you should use 69. A man comes down from his climax too quickly, and takes too long to build back up sufficiently to move right into doing a good job of eating pussy, unless he had that on his mind from the beginning.

About the only problem the uninitiated man has is over the perceived bad smell and taste of a woman's secretions. Many men, and women, think that the tastes and odors associated with a woman's pussy are offensive. This isn't so, the natural fragrance and taste of the fresh secretions from a clean healthy woman are usually beautiful and erotic to a man. This question needs to be settled at the very beginning. A couple should take turns tasting and smelling her pussy's natural fluids when she's fresh and clean. Once a man tries it, the taste and smell of a woman's sex will excite him and he'll look forward to it. When a man fingers a woman and then smells, licks, sucks the juice off his finger and sighs as if in heaven, she'll forget this problem and he can dive right in.

As you'll see later, the shaft of a man's cock isn't overly sensitive to touch on any particular spot, but it does respond to pressure, and there are a lot of nerve endings when you include all of it. Don't forget that much of the pleasure we derive from sex is in the mind, it's psychological, emotional. When a man feels a woman's warm soft mouth and tongue giving his cock a workout, feels her trying to suck his balls out through it, sees her look up at him as her lips slide down over it until her face is buried in his bush, the overall feeling is hard to describe. When you take all of this into account, she should take all of his cock into her mouth and throat at appropriate times while she's giving head.

It's not a big deal with most men if a women doesn't want to swallow his cum, he just doesn't want her to take his cock out of her mouth until he's finished cuming. When he's fucking you, you feel that you're drawing him into yourself when you cum, part of his sexual makeup is a mirror image of yours, he feels that he's being drawn into you when he cums. He needs for you to keep his cock in your mouth, continuing to increase the intensity of your fellatio, until he cums and his climax lets down. It's a real letdown for him if you take his cock out of your warm soft mouth just as he's reaching the climax that you've both worked so hard for and jack him off into a wet towel. Taking his cum into your mouth and swallowing it can be an intensely intimate act for both, it can be a significant symbolic gesture of love.

Good sex isn't just the pleasure of reaching a climax, it's when you share each other's climax, it's when a woman's efforts to bring her man to climax excite her to the point where she could almost cum, sometimes his climax drives her over the top. It's the same for the man. When a man is passionately eating out a woman's pussy, he's got a hard-on that won't quit. He wants to bury his face in her muff and thrust his tongue into her cunt, join with her body. It's not unusual for a man to get so worked up emotionally while he's eating a woman's pussy that he cums while he's doing it, and none of his sex organs are involved except his mind.

Sex should not be all oral. When the opportunity presents itself, like when you're passionately eating her out, she's starting on her second orgasm and is really hot, you've got a hard-on that just won't quit and she's lying at the edge of the bed with you between her legs. You look down and see that if you just got up on your knees your cock would find itself in her cunt, go ahead and shove it in there and give each other a good fuck. Some women say that they feel lonesome when they're receiving head, they want to be held and kissed. This is why moving from eating her pussy smoothly into fucking her can be very satisfying, it's also a good reason for 69.

In addition to her fashion flair & insight into character, with over 8 years of experience in sales/marketing in financial service, manufacturing, and retail industries, Jamie multi-dimensionally brings a "grassroots" background to a career as an image consultant to provide assistance in creating, improving, and maintaining the appropriate professional/personal image with a sense of style & a touch of each client's unique personality.

Jamie received her M.B.A. in Finance & Marketing from University of Miami, Coral Gables Florida. Prior to creating JCIC, Jamie was a Sales/Marketing Manager of a furniture company. She is a member of the Association of Image Consultants International, The Entrepreneurial Center, and the National Association of Female Executives.

Jamie Chang, MBA in Marketing & Finance

Image & Social Etiquette Consultant

Fashion & Wardrobe Stylist

JCIC-Jamie Chang's Image Consulting

P: 718-640-6720

F: 917-591-6137

E: jamie@jcic.us

U: http://jcic.us

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Jamie_Chang