Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Lights, Camera, Passion - 10 Steps to Re-ignite the Passion in Your Relationship - By Josie Hill

Remember when you couldn’t keep your hands off each other? A lot of us have come to expect that the passion wears off after a few years, but it doesn’t have to. Here are 10 steps to follow for lasting passion.

1. A Play Called Passion

Think back to a passionate moment you shared together. Choose a really vivid memory. Spend some time alone reliving the memory – seeing it again through your own eyes. Sit, or stand in the same way as in your memory. Focus on what you can see, hear, taste, touch and feel.

Breathe the same way. Make the same movements and the same facial expressions. By now you should be sizzling!

2. Casting the Role

We play lots of roles in life. You might be the sweet charming girl, the patient caring mom, and the strong objective leader – all in one afternoon! It is natural to have several characters. The problem comes when your partner falls in love with a character and, over time, you stop being her. You have a personality inside you that is passionate and sexy. Give this character a name. What name would best suit your steamy memory? If you know her name, you can bring her out on stage!

3. Book the Show

In the first flushes of passion we spend ages plotting romantic surprises. You have to keep doing this through the years, even if it means putting a reminder in your diary. Don’t get stuck thinking that pre-meditated = boring. Yes, spontaneity is fun, but so is secretly planning something sexy. Make a routine out of passion!

4. Set the Stage

We all like it when someone makes an effort for us. So make an effort for him. Trust me, he will appreciate it. You want him to know when he walks in the room that this is something special.

5. Rehearse

Visualize! Spend some time mentally rehearsing the event; how it will go and how you will act. Keep playing it over in your mind until it is perfect. You need to pay special attention to this step if your passionate character has not been making a lot of appearances in your life lately. The more you rehearse, the easier it will be.

6. Get into Character

Remember your sizzling memory and spend some time bringing your sexy character to life before you go out and knock his socks off. Don’t forget to dress the part!

7. On Stage

No, only kidding. You are on your own here. But don’t get stressed if it doesn’t go to plan, you can improvise. Put it into perspective - this is one moment of your whole life. Go out there and have fun, and remember to smile.

8. The Show Must Go On

A successful relationship takes hard work and effort. Over the years you might not always feel you are in love. Sometimes you just have to pretend. If you are not feeling passionate, you should act “as if” and the spark will come back to life. If the flames of passion are dying – FAN THEM! Don’t sit back and let them die out.

9. Worshiping Fan

Remember that you are doing this because you love your partner and you want to make him happy. His happiness is ultimately yours. Don’t keep score. If you could buy your partner an expensive gift, you would. Your passion is a gift, and it grows as you keep on giving.

10. In the Spotlight

You will get more of what you focus on. If you focus on how wonderful and sexy and caring he is, he will only become more sexy and caring. If you focus on how happy you are together and how much you love each other, you will get more love and happiness. Couples who stay in love excel at focusing on the good. That doesn’t mean they don’t see the bad, only that it pales to insignificance.

Now that you know how to keep the flames of passion burning, why not make a special guest appearance in your own romantic life - tonight.

Josie Hill – the Wedding Coach – specialises in helping brides cope with the overwhelm that can come with planning a wedding, and with helping newly married women manage the transition from bride to wife. You can email her to book your complimentary coaching session on

© Josie Hill – The Wedding Coach 2006 You are welcome to reproduce this article on your website or newsletter, as long as the author’s full details and website are given.

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